Book Review: Going Postal

Going Postal opens on the very last day of the unfortunate Moist Von Lipwig's (a.k.a. Albert Spangler and any number of other aliases) life. He's made a good run of it as a swindler and a con man, but he's been apprehended and sentenced to hang that morning.  Sometimes, however, you get an angel, this time in the guise of Ankh Morpork's tyrannical ruler Lord Vetinari. Moist has a choice to make -- execution or … become Postmaster of the Ankh Morpork Post Office, which has fallen on hard times in recent years.

Being Postmaster isn't all golden suits and wingéd hats. First, Von Lipwig must prove himself to the Post Office Workers, then he finds himself in direct competition with the Grand Trunk Semaphore Company, a telecommunications conglomerate that's "too big to fail." (Which begs the question, does Pratchett possess some weird sixth sense or does Tim Geithner read Terry Pratchett?)

Terry Pratchett is simply a genius. He has a knack for hitting every nail squarely on the head. His writing is often classified as "fantasy" because it takes place on Discworld, but make no mistake about it: Pratchett's feet are planted firmly on Earth and he is satirizing everything about it he can get his hands on.

As far as I am concerned, Terry Pratchett is among the best living writers in the English-speaking world. He incorporates science, sociology, and fantasy with a wicked sense of humor. He leaves nothing unskewered, but he does it all with an absolutely generous heart. 

Highly, highly recommended.

Jerry, the Mail Carrier

Last Tuesday, my stepfather Bob was taking his daily walk to Einstein Bagels for coffee. He had been commenting recently how tired he gets (which doesn't seem surprising because he is in his late eighties.) On Tuesday he barely made it to the strip mall where Einstein's is located, when he started having severe chest pains, causing him to almost fall over. Jerry was delivering mail at the time, saw him, and rushed to him. He got Bob to an outdoor seating area of a Chinese restaurant, got Bob's pills from his pocket and gave him one,  called 911, and stayed with him until he was on the ambulance.

I intend to go find Jerry this week, so that I can personally thank him. And after I ascertain that he won't get in trouble (you never know with the Post Office) I will let his superiors know what he did.

Meanwhile, Bob arrived at the hospital where it was determined that he had a blocked artery, and as he was being taken to the cardiac cath lab, he had a second heart attack because another artery was blocked as well. So he received two stents at the same time.

All is well that ends well. Bob is doing okay and going home today. Had Jerry not been there or not been paying attention, I'm afraid that the outcome would have been very different. Jerry is a hero in my mind.

What about a simple kiss?

The dramatic play can become quite dramatic in my kindergarten classroom. Take today, for instance. There was a group of five or six children in the housekeeping area. One child -- obviously a princess -- took a bite of a poisoned apple, and fell down dead. The other children laid her out on a bier, covered her with a blanket and surrounded her with plastic fruit. My teaching partner intervened momentarily when they commenced with the CPR compressions (apparently the fruit wasn't working its magic) because she was afraid they would hurt the victim patient. Then they all kneeled around her in a circle and put their hands together and prayed. And a miracle occurred! The expired princess leapt to her feet, alive again, and then the whole group refused to clean up their mess. Hallelujah!

Ah yes, never a boring moment in my profession.

Book Review: Boys and Girls Forever: Children's Classics from Cinderella to Harry Potter

This is a book of essays on children's literature by Alison Lurie, who is a Pulitzer Prize winner and a professor of children's literature at Cornell University. Most of these essays appeared at an earlier time in the New York Times Book Review. I picked this up on a whim from a display at my branch library, being a sucker for reading about children's literature.


To tell you the truth, these essays really annoyed me. I really didn't see a point to this book, except maybe to gather her essays in one place -- if gathered they needed to be. Each one read like a long-winded lecture from someone steeped in the self-importance of academia: Hans Christian Anderson (about whose writing I took an entire semester-long class in college), Louisa May Alcott, L. Frank Baum, John Masefield, Walter de la Mare, Dr. Seuss, Tove Jansson, J.K. Rowling, and then some more general essays on fairytales, nursery rhymes and games, illustrations, and the role of nature in children's literature. Each essay was a pronouncement: "This means that" and "This wrought these changes." They also read like the countless essays I had to write, demanding that I "compare and contrast A with B." (Dr. Lurie, please compare and contrast Tove Jansson's Moomintroll books with A.A. Milne's Winnie-the-Pooh.)


For me, as a person who spends every day in the living, breathing company of young children and books, so many of her pronouncements seemed wooden, and well, academic. I admit, that may well have been her intent, but it didn't sit well with me. I kept having flashbacks to the children's literature class I took as an undergrad at Keene State College, taught by a salty new England woman with an accent so thick you could cut it with a knife who intoned on and on about May Hill Arbuthnot (a noted children's literature scholar and the author of our textbook.)


I don't know how old Lurie is -- old enough to have 3 grandchildren to whom she dedicates the book -- or if she is still teaching, has even stepped into a book store any time recently, or when these essays were first written because her knowledge of illustrators seemed to stop with Maurice Sendak (she likes his later work -- which I find kids don't particularly care for) and Arnold Lobel (who died 23 years ago.) In other words, the essays were very narrow in their scope.


Now I am going to expose my deep-seated prejudice with a question: Why is Harry Potter considered a classic piece of children's literature, while other modern fantasies that have been around much longer (Lloyd Alexander's Prydain Chronicles, Joan Aiken's Wolves of Willoughby Chase, and The Hobbit for heaven's sake) get barely a nod in their direction?

I guess I have to say that children's literature is anything but academic to me. It is alive, and I am far moire interested in how to apply it (i.e. do the kids enjoy it when I read to them?) than what meanings might be hiding in the subtexts. Unless you want to re-live your undergraduate college literature courses, I would advise steering clear of this book. I wish I had.

Book Review: Mr. Darcy Takes A Wife

Subtitled Pride and Prejudice Continues, this book conjectures the life that the lovely and spunky Elizabeth Bennett shared with the taciturn Mr. Darcy after their marriage. First, let me begin by saying that the amount of sex was absolutely ludicrous and I really didn't need to be constantly reminded that Mr. Darcy was, um, well-endowed. Once I got beyond that (to the point where I just rolled my eyes when "it" was mentioned) I really enjoyed this book immensely (no pun intended, really!)

If you know anything of my reading habits, you know that good writing is paramount. If a book is badly written -- no matter how interesting the topic -- I usually can't finish it. This book was well written. The author, Linda Berdoll, apparently is a huge (there's that image again) fan of Jane Austen and actually did some research for this book both into the language and the historical times. I thought it was interesting to have the familiar characters placed in a historical context -- the end of the reign of mad King George, the Napoleonic Wars -- for surely intelligent characters like Darcy and Elizabeth would have had some interest in the world around them (once they got out of bed, off of the floor, back from the lovely sun-dappled copse on the Pemberly grounds …)

What else besides sex? Intrigue, bastard children, murder, swashbuckling rescues, plus a return of the many other characters that Austen conjured up in the original Pride and Prejudice: the good and lovely Jane and her precious Bingley, the ne'er-do-well Wickham and his silly wife Lydia, Elizabeth's good friend Charlotte, the vicar Mr. Collins and his patroness the Lady Catherine de Burgh, Darcy's sister Georgiana, Mr. and Mrs. Bennett …

You want serious literature? This isn't it. Mr. Darcy Takes a Wife is pure candy, and I have to say I haven't had as much plain fun reading a book in quite a while. Heaving bosoms and all.